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Independence and what it means to us

Independence and what it means to us

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high
Where knowledge is free
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments
By narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit

Where the mind is led forward by thee
Into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country* awake 

                                                                                                                  –  Rabindranath Tagore

(*QWEEN QUIRK- read “women” instead of “country”)

Google, Webster and our modern-day society describe independence as “freedom from rules and outside control.” We want to speak the way we want, dress the way we want, act the way we want. Simply put, we are who we are, and that is the way we are determined to be, without reserve.

To achieve independence from outside control, you have to learn to achieve independence from inside control, our inner inhibitions and demons.

Financial Independence– To be financially independent is so important that I feel, it should be added as our fundamental right. To be able to do what you want , you need money, you should be allowed and be able to earn, and spend wisely .A woman who doesn’t know her way through finances, will always be dependent on someone to take her through. It’s said it’s the money that makes the world go round, and if you don’t know your money, it will make you go around someone who does!

You can be financially independent even when you are not working, by building your own funds through saving whatever you can and start from there. Gradually, you will enjoy the process so much that you might end up being an entrepreneur or take up a job that matches your capabilities.

Emotional Independence– How many times have we pushed our workout or diet programmes, our desire to pursue hobbies or a vocation to the back of our minds , only to accommodate wishes of others? Ironically, so many women spend endless hours chatting about how difficult it is to find some time of their own.

The secret wish in most women’s heart to become something, to do something worthwhile simply dies down in their hearts itself. Is it the people around them, family, society, circumstances responsible for this?

I would quote Karl Marx here- “You have nothing to lose but your chains”

Women tie them up with this notion of caring for others before caring for themselves. Being a people pleaser makes sure we are always last on our own priority list.  Unless women are able to love themselves freely, they will not be able to love others either.

So, take that much needed break, go out and get a breath of fresh air, feel free even if for just a few minutes, every single day. Give yourself freedom to chose that you want to spend your time and life with, shut out others, if not physically, at least mentally, not allowing any negative person, thought or constraint to affect you in any way. After all, it is your life, and your happiness is paramount.




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